she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
