Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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