McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize