Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Hippo gnu deer
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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