Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
