im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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