So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
