WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize