Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
