This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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