how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
