Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I've blown a few things in my day
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
