She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
