508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
