Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
