I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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