Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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