so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize