She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Found the puke drawer
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
