Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He? As in you personified your dick?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
