i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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