I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
