super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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