Whod you bang
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
