Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We need a shit load of segways right now
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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