I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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