worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
