And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Randomize
