just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
