i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize