By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Oh god it's open bar.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize