ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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