It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
