Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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