Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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