But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
