She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
She swung at the pinata with crutches
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
