i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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