Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
