Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize