i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
