so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
