i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It's just like the Real World with babies
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize