I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
