ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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