you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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