you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
