i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
