GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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