I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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