Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
